Where have I been?


Even though the force of youth no longer drives me up lifes path, my more mature mind and the weight of the years adds the inertial  momentum to help me climb an amazing distance up lifes road.[At what point do the gears of youth kick out and years of maturity kick in?] Have you ever driven up a long,long slope, then turned around to see where you have been and realized that the fog you see is really the top of the clouds you passed during your journey thus far? An expedition back down that trail already blazed, and before long all the memories of the acts you have done,all the missions accomplished, the people well met,  others not so well, pitfalls entered then worked around, the fights that were fought,victories won, battles lost, loves that seemed once so pure, now experience tainted, minor loves of the time now missed most of all, threaten to overwhelm, but suddenly, with the weight of the future laid to rest, the brakes of memory grab hold. So the past becomes clearer as we approach our beginning.Now my journey takes me back to a place where the purist thrills to be found are simple yet satisfying. Learning to tie my shoes, ride a bike, how to read, fly my kite: these focal points of life shine through the clouds of the past. I can trace my trip back a bit further than most, or so I was told by my father and mother, who were proud of how far back my memory could meander. I hate to brag, but the sight of the big porcelain bowl approaching my skinny white butt, while I tried to make my deposit into a grownups throne still gives me a fright, even though the memory of how my out thrown elbows caught the edges and saved my mission to my mothers delight, still casts the light of a candle in my minds deepest well.  Well now I have wandered off the course of my tale, my original thought was of persuing my future, so I will retrace my steps to the present  I think, but a few stops ‘long the way will delay my restart. A lot of places in the history of my life, need revisited from time to time in order that dreams created along the way do not get mixed up with real memory. It helps to keep the path clear.

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